I've been trying to relax for a long time now. Ever since my brother and I came to the USA all we've done is work. I was 14 yrs old. When we came 1 month before school with only two words of english and had to have help from everybody it was really hard. Then every weekend we had to work till we graduated. Every weekend of school we worked never went to any dances, or games or anything. Then we started working full time after graduation when I was 18 yrs. old. Since then till now I can count the vacations I've taken on one hand. I've never played games or had anything to do with fun stuff other than the partying we used to do every night after work witch was pretty often. I felt like the only time I relaxed was when I had some beers in me (actually a lot of beers) and now i find it extremely hard to relax or understand what it feels like to be relax. It's nobody's fault but my own. If I would of been more outspoken about having a day off or if I didn't put myself under so much pressure maybe things would be different now since all I've ever done is work all the time. Now I look at my life and realize that I have to try to change for the sake of my beautiful child and my beautiful wife. I have nothing to complain about. I love my life, the opportunities I've been fortunate to have (with a lot of very hard work) but I want more. I want to be able to take my wife out to dinner and not worry about anything. I want to live a lot more than just being a machine(literally). I want to feel exited. I've been so immersed in work for so long that I forgot how to feel joy in many things. Not the love I have for my family and beautiful Xavitron (our english bulldog)and my brother, they all make me very happy, I believe that little by little I can achieve my goals and this one is going to be my priority.

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I think it's great that you are open like this, and that you want to change abd become a better man for your wife and a father for your child. I think that you can do anything that you put your mind into doing. Life is not easy we have obstacles and we are humans we are allowed to fall and make mistakes.

Always know that you must take care of yourself first...b happy with yourself first...when you are truly at peace with yourself, your entire life community will feel it too! Another win-win!
You don't have to go out and spend money...the beautiful parks, a picnic basket and a nice bottle of wine is very special. Take the time to relax and enjoy these intimate times...they are vacations too!

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